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In this episode of How Long ’Til Bedtime?, Allison shares the story behind a moment of holiday reflection that shifted her entire approach to the season. After attending a women’s brunch centered around intention—not perfection—she found herself wondering how she truly wants to move through December, especially in a year filled with travel, transitions, and a quieter Christmas at home.

A conversation at the dinner table with her kids opened her eyes to what actually matters most to them during the holidays—and spoiler alert: it wasn’t big events, complicated outings, or long lists of gifts. Their top priorities were simple, connected, meaningful… and surprisingly easy to honor.

Inside the episode, Allison explores:
— How an intentional gathering inspired a reset in her approach to the holidays
— Why asking kids what they value can change everything
— The three simple traditions her children named as their must-dos
— How small, slow moments often hold the most magic
— The power of curiosity before the calendar fills up with “shoulds”
— A few simple prompts you can use tonight to learn what matters most to your kids

If the holiday season already feels overwhelming—or if you’ve ever felt pressure to create the “perfect” December—this episode is your reminder:
You get to choose.
Your family gets to choose.
And intention often begins with one small question.

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From baby sleep to toddler sleep, daycare naps to sleep training—How Long ’Til Bedtime? is the podcast for parents who want practical, guilt-free sleep tips they can actually use.

Hosted by pediatric sleep coach Allison Egidi, each episode delivers real solutions for every stage—from navigating newborn sleep struggles and weaning night feedings to helping your 3-year-old fall asleep independently (and stay asleep!). Whether you’re trying to make sense of daycare sleep patterns, craving your evenings back, or simply need a working mom podcast to keep you grounded, you’re in the right place.

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Scroll down for a full transcript of this episode.

217. The One Question That Changed My Approach to the Holidays This Year

Before we dive in, I want to talk about hobbies. Recently, I was a guest on the Found At 40 podcast and we talked about how I picked up tennis as my 40th birthday present to myself. It has brought me so much joy over the past four years. And that’s despite the fact that I tore my Achilles’ plane, had to do six months of intense rehab and then had to slowly work my way back up to playing competitive tennis. Well, last night I went to an end of season tennis party that one of the ladies on our USTA team hosted and we chatted, laughed, we had a white elephant gift exchange. I think she called it a dirty Santa gift exchange because we could steal gifts. And I stayed up way past my bedtime.

And on the drive home, I found myself thinking about how nice it was to connect with this group of women. Some are almost 10 years younger than me. Some are closer to my mom’s age. And some are moms that I convinced to start playing tennis with me and others I never would have met if I hadn’t ventured out onto the tennis courts.

Prioritizing a hobby is not always easy as a parent, but my goodness, is it worth it? Especially when it brings new people and friendships into your life or it reconnects you with people who you don’t get to see that often because we’re all going in a million different directions. So if you need a little nudge to prioritize a hobby for yourself in the new year, let this be it because you deserve it.
Okay, on to today’s episode, which is actually also about connection and priorities. Today, I want to share how I found out what matters most to my kids during the holidays and how it led to some reflection and rebalancing of my own priorities.

Hey there, Allison here. Welcome back to How Long ‘Til Bedtime. Today’s episode is one that came out of a moment of reflection for me. And honestly, out of a little nudge I’ve gotten more than once over the last few weeks. If you’ve been listening recently, you may remember that in two of the recent episodes in my before we dive in segment, I talked about the women’s brunch I attended.

This really special, thoughtful gathering that left me thinking hard about how I want to move through this holiday season just continued to sit with me. Something about being in a room full of women who were actively choosing intention, not perfection, not pressure, not the perfect Pinterest Christmas, just intention, it just stuck with me.

And it got me paying attention to how I want to show up during the holidays, especially knowing that this year is going to look a little different for us. We’re doing what so many families do and that’s making the rounds. We’re going to be in Chicago before Christmas visiting my in-laws. We’re going to be in Florida after Christmas visiting my family. And for four days, including Christmas day, it’s just the four of us here at our home in Charlottesville.

It’s going to be a quieter few days, a small circle. And Christmas is different now that both of my girls know the truth about Santa. And honestly, that felt like this little invitation, this opening for me to ask, what is actually important to us, what makes this season special for our family? Meaning my core little unit. And then it kind of hit me. If I want this season to feel meaningful, maybe I should start by asking the two people who experienced the holidays with the most enthusiasm and who are still looking for the magic throughout the season. And that would be my kids.

So one night at dinner, I said, okay, tell me what are the things that really make the holidays feel special to you? What are the things that we have to include this month? And I was delighted, surprised, honestly, a little relieved by their answers. There was no mention of big events, no lists of gifts.

No elaborate outings, even though we love a family adventure. We’re about to go on one this weekend. Their top three things that they mentioned were baking cookies together and a desire to give cookies to neighbors. Our neighborhood has been through a lot this year. The second was decorating the house as a family.

And the third was reading a holiday related book out loud together. All four of us taking turns reading. That was it. Those were the three. Simple, connected, and all doable. And what struck me most was that these were not things that I necessarily would have guessed.

If you had asked me what I thought was most important to my kids. I mean, cookies and decorating, sure, because they ask about baking cookies and they are always eager to decorate. So I guess I wasn’t too surprised by those. But the chapter book read aloud, that was something we just ventured into last year for the first time. And we actually ended up not even finishing the book. I don’t think I realized how much they were enjoying it. And that one kind of touched me a little bit. It reminded me that our kids often value those slow moments far more than the big productions that we sometimes feel pressure to orchestrate. It also reminded me that kids really do love simple traditions and that connection usually sits at the heart of the things that are so meaningful to them and that they may mention as important. And sometimes we’re so busy, we forget to actually stop and talk about what we want to prioritize as a family. Or what I really should say is sometimes I am so busy doing all of the things that I forget to take a beat and ask.

So here’s where I want to invite you in. This episode really isn’t about cookies or decorating or finding that perfect holiday book. Although as of this recording, I am still on the hunt for a great holiday related chapter book for all of us to read together this year. But this episode is about getting curious because you know, I love to get curious.

It’s about taking a breath before this season sweeps you up in all the chaos and asking your kids, asking your partner, asking yourself, hey, what matters to you? What are the things that make the holidays feel special in your eyes? And I encourage you to ask your kids this before you finalize the rest of your December calendar. Ask them before you stress about every to do that you think must be done because you think it is super important to your kids. Ask them before you assume you already know. Because the truth is many parents build the holiday season around what we think our kids want.

Instead of what our kids actually cherish, it’s possible your kids may not need half of what you’re putting pressure on yourself to orchestrate. They may just want to bake a batch of cookies and give it to their neighbors to decorate the Christmas tree together, not just having you do it late night after they go to bed or uninterrupted time where we’re not distracted by our phones and all the things and you’re just sitting together in the bed or on the couch reading a book. If you want help getting the ball rolling, here’s a very simple prompt that you can use tonight at the dinner table or when you’re sitting in bed, cuddling for those last couple of minutes before you tuck your child in.

You can just ask, what’s something we do during the holidays that you really love and want to make sure we keep doing? And is there anything new that sounds fun to try this year? That’s how we ended up with the book. You guys, I heard someone talk about it on either a podcast or on like an Instagram reel. I brought it up to the kids and they loved the idea and apparently now it’s in their top three or just another simple question is, If we could only do three things this holiday season together as a family, what would they be? And just get curious to hear what they say and to decide what you want to prioritize. Asking my kids what we do during the holidays that they really love and want to make sure we do this year reminded me that traditions do not always have to be big and they don’t have to be expensive. And the ones my kids mentioned aren’t elaborate either. What makes something a tradition is that it’s repeated with intention. And intention is something I continue to remind myself to hold onto as our family calendar quickly fills with practices, games, events, all of the things.

So if the holiday season is already feeling overwhelming, or if you find yourself doing things because you feel like you should, this is your reminder that you get to choose. Let this be your season of choosing with intention, and let your kids’ be a part of that. Prioritize the simple things that matter to you all. Because those are the things that they’re going to remember. Here’s to a holiday season that feels intentional, connected, and maybe, hopefully, fingers crossed, a little more simple. Thanks for listening. I will see you all back here next week. Bye for now.